One day after requesting for privacy in the wake of her younger brother’s reported suicide, actress Nadine Lustre took to Instagram to write two posts that addressed her family’s recent tragedy.
Nadine’s brother, identified as 16-year old Isaiah Lustre, was found dead in their home at Barangay Talipapa in Quezon City at around 7:45PM last Sunday. Police investigators recovered an empty shell of a .38 caliber handgun and later ruled the death as a suicide.
In her first post that she wrote Thursday, Nadine did not initially refer to Isaiah’s death and, without acknowledging if her brother had suffered from depression, admitted that she herself has been struggling with it for many years.
The first part of the lengthy post enumerated how Nadine copes with her own personal issues.
“It may come as a surprise to you, but I have struggled with depression way back and still am to this day. I have days where Im just sitting in the tub, asking myself a lot of questions, confused.. I felt like I was just looking in someone else’s life through a window. Feeling bad cuz I am not enough and everything that I do and will do will never be enough. Its not easy. I have days when I have to put a mask on, smiling, numbing myself from negative emotions, too often I have already mastered the art of hiding it, I bet, you never even noticed it.”
In the second part, Nadine said she’s blessed to have a strong support system of family and friends.
“Im thankful that Im blessed to have a strong heart and clear mind. Family who will always be my strength. Friends who will always pull me up. Love who will always guide me.”
The rest of Nadine’s post made subtle references to Isaiah’s demise as she started to tell her followers that whatever their problems are, suicide is not the answer.
“[I]f you ever hit rock bottom, dont be ashamed of opening up to your loved ones. if anyone understands and cares about what you’re going through, its them. You are who/what you say you are.If you think you’re weak, you will be weak. If you tell yourself you are not worthy, you will be unworthy. But, if you say you’re strong, you will be strong and If you tell yourself you can do it, you can do anything.The ONLY validation that you will ever need is one from yourself.”
“If you’re HEARTBROKEN, cry it out, okay.. and then STOP. Pick yourself up and dust it off. He/She ain’t the last person on earth.Trust me when I tell you that you will find someone else… meant for you and who will better you.I didn’t believe that before either, but here I am now. DONT EVEN think about hurting yourself or taking your life just because you want the pain and sadness to stop.”
The final part of Nadine’s post seems to hint that she, too, once contemplated on taking her own life.
“ITS OKAY to be sad. ITS OKAY to feel pain. ITS OKAY to be vulnerable. We are made to have emotions. Dont be afraid to let it out. Before you do something you will regret, think about all the great things that you can do in the future, people you will meet and places you travel to, the lives you will touch. I almost did it before and Im so thankful that I didn’t do it, because If I did, I wouldn’t be living the life that I have now. Stay with us because life is beautiful.
In her second post, Nadine paid tribute to Isaiah and thanked him for “teaching everyone a very important lesson.”
“Im so proud of you. Never knew you had such talent with words. Im happy to have read all of your entries and discover that you have such a beautiful mind. Excited to read your scripts/stories soon.”
“I want to thank you for teaching everyone a very important lesson. Thank you for opening my eyes and making me braver. I know now that whatever challenge I will have to face, I will be able to pull through because of you.”
“Im gonna miss your face and miss hearing your corny jokes. I wish you stayed with us longer. I am keeping my promise and we will still travel the world together. No more crying. Happy Birthday Dude. Joyeux voyage, je t’aime frère”
In this post, Nadine also posted a link to Isaiah’s writings on the online publishing platform, Medium. The link, however, is no longer accessible.
Prior to these two posts, Nadine requested her followers for respect by refraining to post photos and videos of her taken during the funeral. In another post, she warned everyone who has been “judging” her for the past few days that they will always see her up but never down. “Get lost, please,” she ended.
She also assured her followers who have been sharing stories of weakness that she is reading every one of them. “Wait for me…I GOT U.”
The earlier posts were made through Instagram Stories, which can only be viewed for 24 hours.